The Best Meal Replacement Shakes for Total Life Optimization (2025)

OWYN stands for “only what you need,” which feels similar to the pitch Dozer gives Neo in The Matrix as he sets our hero up with a bowl of protein-rich slop for his first meal after being yanked back into what’s left of the real world. OWYN does offer a caffeinated version of its protein shakes, but this iteration merely references coffee in name and flavor. The liquid is thin and easy enough to put down, with a tingle of artificial sweetener on the finish that quickly gives way to a coffee flavor that’s not unlike something you’d taste at a janky ice cream stand that offers something like “Jim’s Jacked-Up Java” as the milkshake flavor of the month.

The slim stats in the protein and fat categories combined with the coffee-adjacent placebo had me feeling shaky and malnourished by 10 am most days when I replaced my breakfast with OWYN. This is not a great pick if you’re trying to go the distance without chewing or even thinking about procuring a proper meal, but it could be a nice post-lunch boost that does an OK job of scratching the itch for a sweet coffee treat. Top off your actual cold brew with this coffee-flavored glurp if you’re feeling naughty, or you can toss what’s left of your McDonald’s coffee from the drive to work into the fridge, then mix it around with a bottle of OWYN a few hours later if you’re feeling downright trashy.

One can learn a lot about a health brand by its collab co-signs. Since its founding in 2016 by recovering addict/ex-con/ur-patriot Aaron Singerman, Redcon1 has hitched its star to Nascar and the US military, along with junk-food brands like Hostess and the newly revitalized soda brand Jolt Cola. This handily explains its expansive selection of kooky supplement flavors, which are essentially drinkable pastries that allege to help you get swole.

When prepared per the suggestion of its packaging, the combo of about 30 grams of cookies ’n’ cream powder mixed with 6 ounces of water yields a thick beige liquid that’s punctuated by little black clumps of cookie dust. It’s as weird as it is tasty, and if I weren’t already the type of person who thought a selfie in front of an Arby’s was a solid Tinder profile pic, I would probably be ashamed to like this as much as I did. Once you get used to the sweet and dusty bits of cookie that bust open when you chew them, this is a fun ride for anyone who can hang.

Redcon1’s MRE series is technically a protein powder, but it’s heavy on protein for its rather diminutive calorie count, making it a fine meal replacement assuming you have a salad or some other fibrous food item on deck for lunch or dinner. One 6-ounce glass of this candy-like slurry filled me right up in the morning, and I was good to go until salad time rolled around at noon.